I'm sorry for not posting since last Thursday. After Nathan left, I had 4 long days to realize that I am so lonely. I realized that Nathan is the only person I have to talk to. That combined with Bethany's continued on-and-off nursing issues, I just wasn't very up to posting anything. It has taken longer than I thought for me to adjust to living out here. And, to be quite honest, it's been very frustrating to constantly have people tell me how lucky I am to live here. Yeah, it's nice, but I don't know anybody. And it's hard to make friends with people at this age. I know I'm still young, but a lot can happen in your life over 27 years. And it's weird to make friends with someone and they don't know about my "baggage" (I'm just using that as a term for my experiences, not as something negative). I miss my family. I miss my friends. I miss my "sister" Lilly. And I miss my friends in Chicago TERRIBLY. And now I'm way out here, in the middle of nowhere, with not enough financial stability to go and visit any of the above mentioned people. Nathan suggested that I take a trip by myself. I love him for that. However, I don't feel like I could go anywhere without Bethany. And not just because I would miss her, but because everyone I would go visit would want to see her. Which, of course, is understandable. I guess I was better able to adjust in Chicago, and again when we moved back to Orlando, because I had SAI and a job. DON'T GET ME WRONG! I AM VERY HAPPY STAYING AT HOME! :) I really don't need the added stress of working. BTW, my hair is falling out. When I was washing my hair the last couple of days, I pulled out handfuls. Anyway, there's no SAI here either. Yes, I am going to affiliate with the International Chapter (for people with no physical chapter within 50 miles) but there's no group of people to hang out with. We're working on the church thing (we've narrowed it down to 2), and I'm going to try going to their mom's groups and not wait to do that after we've joined a church. Please pray for me. If God wants us to stay here for the long term, I don't want to be miserable. And pray that if God shows us another opportunity, that we'll know what to do. I would like to think that He sent us here for a while so that when the "big opportunity" comes and we have to move to, say, Arizona or Washington, it won't feel like we live so far from our friends and family. And, we'll appreciate the "cheap" flights home! :)
Okay, now to the happy stuff!
I got Bethany to laugh again yesterday! It's still not predictable when she'll do it, but I told her that she has to do it while Grandma and Grandpa are here. She is so excited, by the way! She can't WAIT for them to get here! She has so many things she wants to tell them about and (weird, I know) she's ready to try chewing someone else's fingers for a change!
She's rolling back to front more frequently now. And she does it much faster.
Daddy brought her a little stuffed moose from Canada, eh? She really likes him. His snout is particularly tasty!
Yes, we were having some trouble nursing the past week or so. But, I've decided to go with what she wants. Most of you know I'm not an incredibly patient person, and fighting with her to nurse (she would scream her head off!) was just making me more frustrated. So, if she doesn't want it, she gets a bottle. That's it. I'm not going to make it an issue. There is nothing wrong with me not breastfeeding exclusively for a year, or even 6 months. All babies are different, and all moms are different. Okay, off of that soap box!
She's starting to talk more when we're out, too. We went to check out Sam's yesterday, and she just babbled on the whole time. And, she was flirting with a man in the elevator. (Sigh), they start so young... :)
Well, this picture is super cute. This was yesterday in the swing:
Thanks for listening to me vent for a bit. I'll try to post again tonight, but I think Blogger does something with their servers at just about the time I want to get on. I couldn't get on at all last night.
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